1. What is your favorite word?
I use to always say “sesquipedalian” was my favorite word, but that’s not true. That’s just my favorite word to say. I think my favorite word is “love.” It’s such an amazing thing. It has many uses. A person could write a thousand books, a thousand pages each on love and still not be able to fully understand and appreciate the word, the feeling, in all its complexity.
2. What is your least favorite word?
Considering my favorite word, “hate” would seem the logical choice. However, I am not naive. Everything needs an opposing force; hate is necessary for love to exist. I think “colonel” is my least favorite word. It irritates the hell out of me. There is no “r” in the word, nor is there any letter or combination of letters in the word that would produce an “r” sound. It’s ridiculous. It renders the alphabet useless. It always makes me think of that Monty Python sketch with Mr. Yacht, where “yacht” is pronounced “throat gobbler mangrove".
3. What turns you on?
Talent, ambition, passion, and a bit of arrogance…all qualities my fiancé has.
4. What turns you off?
5. What sound or noise do you love?
There are two. One is the sound of a cat purring. It’s contentment manifested as sound. The second is the noise my dogs make when they’re “talking.” It’s not barking. It’s just a really cute noise.
6. What sound or noise do you hate?
This was the easiest question, but my answer has been the same for as long as I can remember. It’s that blaring, horrible sound of a generic alarm on clock radios. Worst sound ever. It’s not pleasant at all and it only ever woke me for unpleasant things.
7. What is your favorite curse word?
This is probably a toss-up between saying “damn it” or “son of a bitch.” Both come out of my mouth more than they should.
8. What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Criminal psychologist. The mind is such an interesting thing as is, but it’s the unusual and generally brilliant minds of the most infamous criminals that really is…I don’t know. They’re like a never ending puzzle and I like puzzles.
9. What profession would you not like to do?
I would not like to try my hand at corporate stooge.
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?
“Hello. Welcome. There are those who want to see you again. You can stay as long as you want. Think about all you have learned from this life. You can return when you feel that you are ready.”